I sometimes feel like the women who are the loudest and most famous for their outrage against perceived sexism, are terribly inaccurate in their portrayals. They use words like sexism, misogyny, and rape, so liberally, that it makes those words hold less power. This is not doing women worldwide any favours. In language, we have a limited amount of strong words, and we have to be careful how we apply them. After all, when we use these words, we want them to be taken seriously. This does not mean we should avoid these words. It simply means we should make sure that we do not misuse these words to the point that they become uninformative.
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The misuse of Misogyny
In 2012, Julia Gillard gave a speech where she claimed that Tony Abbott was a misogynist. Her usage of this word was so inaccurate, that several dictionaries had to broaden their definition of that word, to make it slightly possible for Abbott to fit that term. I certainly think that Abbott holds old fashioned views on women, but that does not make him a misogynist. A true misogynist is a guy who performs FGM on his 4-year-old daughter, forces her to wear a veil at age 6, marries her off as at age 12 to a guy 30 years her senior and who already has two wives. And then at age 14 when she runs away from being beaten and raped so often, her Father tracks her down and kills her to preserve the family honour. That is a misogynist. But what Gillard would have, is that Abbott and my hypothetical Father be placed in the same boat. Not because it is accurate. Simply because Abbott will be tainted by the association.
The misuse of Rape
At the Democrat Convention in Philedelphia recently, Lena Dunham, another outspoken feminist, represented herself as a sexual assault survivor. In her autobiography, she has provided the world with an account of her harrowing rape and recovery. But the rape isn’t all that harrowing. In fact, it involes her voluntarily going to her own house with a male, engaging in sexual intercourse with him, while talking dirty to him, but throwing him out when she realizes he didn’t put a condom on. At no point did she ever say no to sex, or act in a manner consistent with someone who has not consented. In fact, earlier in the evening a male friend came up to her as she was leaving the party, and questioned her on whether she really wanted to go home with her soon to be sexual partner. She rebuked her friend, and told him to get away from her. She had clearly made up her mind. And yet, several years later she now claims this event was rape. But seriously, if this is what passes for rape nowadays, what do we call the experience of a girl whe gets raped by an unknown assailant, while she screams and cries for help, but nobody hears her. The man leaves her in tatters with her clothes torn and her vagina bleeding and bruised. She lies on the ground for hours as she can hardly get up due to the pain, and now she will never feel safe ever again. Lena Dunham would have us believe that her rape and my hypothetical rape should receive the same label. They shouldn’t. Hers is regret, my hypothetical is horrific.
The misuse of Sexism
On Saturday, Emily Thornberry, the shadow foreign secretary of the Labour party in Britain, accused a Sky News presenter of sexism. Thornberry is known in Britain for her feminist positions and her advocacy on behalf of women. So when she got onto Sky News, she was questioned about Brexit talks and whether she had even contacted the French foreign Minister yet. She had not. But as her lack of political knowledge was becoming more evident, the Presenter asked her if she even knew the name of the French foreign Minister. She did not. She then proceeded to defend her lack of knowledge by charging the presenter with sexism for even asking such ‘pub’ like questions to begin with. She thought it was ridiculous, and wanted to have a serious discussion. So after she voluntarily chose South Korea as the topic of discussion, the presenter asked her for the name of the South Korean President. She again, did not know. By now, she was really pissed off, and redoubled her accusation of sexism. This behaviour does not bode well for women. You cannot level accusations of sexism, simply because you are under-prepared and do not know your portfolio sufficiently. The Presenter would be rightfully considered sexist if he asked her about her cooking or hairstyle. But asking whether she knew the names of key international players, that is not sexist at all. The fact that she didn’t, is a problem. But the bigger problem is that she sought to cover her own lack of knowledge by misusing such a word.
Sexism, rape and misogyny are very real features of life that women face worldwide. And as the West is seeing an increase of migration from heavily misogynstic cultures, our rapes will not look like Lena Dunham’s, our Misogynists will not be like Tony Abbott and our sexists will not be News Presenters asking simple political questions. My hypothetical misogynists and rapists are not so much hypotheticals, but warnings for what is to come and for what has already arrived on the shores of Western Europe. So let’s not use these words lightly, as we may need them in the future.